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British Sex Lives: They’re More Lukewarm Than Red Hot


Sex… it’s everywhere. From TV adverts to reality shows and even naked dating games, our culture makes it seem like everyone’s having sex - and a whole lot of it. 

However, a recent poll from the Royal College of Occupational Therapists revealed that the average Brit only has sex once every eight days, with many claiming a long-term health condition impacts their libido. 

So, what else did the study reveal? More importantly, what can you do to heat up your sex life? Read on to find out. 

Findings from the study show the truth about what goes on in the bedroom

As a society, we often have a lot of misconceptions about sex. Some people think they should be doing it more, and couples often wonder how their bedroom activities compare to other people’s. 

Well, we’re about to unveil the truth about British sex lives. Prepare to be amazed. 

Sex is still a priority

Couples discuss sex 41 times a year on average. They talk about their relationship around 37 times yearly, which shows it’s still an important topic of conversation. Furthermore, one in three people said they’d dump someone terrible in bed. 

In contrast, one in three said they’d stick with their partner, so it’s not all bad. 

Male bravado isn’t as it seems

Another finding highlights the fact that males prefer speaking about sex with their partners, while women are more inclined to turn to their friends. In general, 42% of men choose their partner, while 40% of women discuss problems with friends. 

So much for male bravado! 

Millennials are the most active 

Yes, Gen-Z might be taking over in many respects, but Millennials aged 25-34 still rule the bedroom. Almost three in ten have sex more than once weekly, while those aged between 35 and 44 follow closely behind. 

Just 24% of Gen-Z get physical once a week, while those aged over 65 were quietest in the bedroom. 

Health concerns are holding us back 

People surveyed said the main thing holding them back from an active sex life was a long-term health condition or disability. A whopping two in five adults claimed their health caused issues, and many said it resulted in relationship problems. 

The study also highlighted that a lack of communication between couples caused relationship issues, resulting in further bedroom avoidance. 

How to rev up your sex life


While all of the above might seem disheartening, it’s possible to reverse the effects of a lukewarm sex life and inject some passion into the bedroom. 

Here are some tips to navigate boredom and discover a new lease of life. 

Communication is key 

Problems in the bedroom can be challenging, but not talking about them is the worst thing you can do. 

Numerous studies highlight the importance of communication for a healthy relationship, and taking time to understand one another can reignite passion (Better Health Channel). 

Whether it’s a lack of adventure or erectile dysfunction, speaking to your partner can help you reach a point of understanding and seek help. 

Seek treatment for health conditions 

According to Web MD, a range of health conditions can harm your sex life, including chronic pain, diabetes, cancer and mental health issues. While seeking treatment for the condition itself is most important, that doesn’t mean you can’t take time to focus on your sex life. 

Some people find that certain medications can reduce pain or elevate their mood. For example, individuals with depression might rediscover their libido after taking antidepressants, and arthritis can improve with injections. 

Holistic treatments can also be beneficial, as can therapeutic interventions. Couples who are struggling with poor health can seek counselling, which will deal with any conflict. 

Quality or quantity?

While finding out that the average Brit has sex once every eight days might seem disheartening, it’s important to remember that some people value quality over quantity. 

For example, if you’re saving fantastic sex once a fortnight, that might be better than a quick five minutes every other day. There’s no such thing as normal, and the critical thing to remember is that everyone has unique needs. 

If you and your partner are happy with sex, then nothing needs to change. However, if there’s conflict in the relationship because each person has different needs, this can cause issues further down the line. 

Don’t be complacent 

Nobody wants to find out they’re more sloth than raging bull in the bedroom, but your sexual prowess might not be as impressive as you believe. 

If your partner seems relieved when it’s over or isn’t quite as responsive as you’d like, it might be time to learn some tips. There are plenty of guides available for men to upgrade their skills and discover what women want. 

At the same time, your partner might be failing to light your fire, which can be challenging. Communication and gentle discussions are key here, as nobody wants hurt feelings. 

Embark on an adventure 

There are so many ways to inject some passion into your sex life. For example, heading to the shower can be a welcome treat if you spend the most sexy time in the bedroom. Some couples might require more excitement, and this is where experimenting can pay off. 

BDSM is becoming more popular and mainstream, with many couples saying it enhances their intimacy and benefits their relationship (Psychology Today). 

Whether it’s roleplay, bondage or anything else, sometimes a bit of excitement is all any couple needs. 

Of course, if your partner is unsure about exploring or you’re single and ready to indulge in some fun, booking an escort takes you on a safe and very satisfying journey of discovery. 

The bottom line 

Sex might not be as frequent or exciting as TV and movies would have us believe, but that doesn’t mean we Brits are lost causes. 

By communicating with your partner and ensuring you’re ready to rock someone’s world, it’s possible to make nights in front of the TV a thing of the past. 

Sex isn’t everything, but it’s an integral part of any relationship. Now, all you need to do is decide how to proceed and get ready to enjoy more intimacy.

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